Overcoming Reluctance to Attend Love Reboot
If you are considering a Love Reboot workshop, the following might be helpful in helping you make your decision or overcoming obstacles.
Cost: We know that any amount that is beyond a regular budget, can be an added stressor. This is one of the reasons that we have designed Love Reboot to cost at least half of other effective intensive workshops for marriages in crisis. We are able to do so because of the many donors who support our efforts. Therefore, we are able to maintain the highest quality while making our services much more affordable. Our goal is to help as many families as we can. We want to do whatever we can to make this event possible for you. Please give us a call at 210-823-5282 to inquire about scholarships and/or other payment arrangements.
My spouse is reluctant to attend: If your spouse is resistant to participate, you are not alone! In fact, for most couples who attend a workshop, class or seminar for marriages, there is usually one reluctant spouse. There could be several reasons for this:
They fear that their spouse is going to put the focus on them instead of taking responsibility for themselves.
They fear that they won’t get effective help.
They would like to try something less intensive, less costly and less time-consuming to see if that works before committing to something of this caliber.
They believe there is no hope left for their marriage.
Here are some suggestions for overcoming these obstacles:
Let them know that your focus is going to be on your own self-growth, not on “fixing” them. Your goal is to learn to be a better relater to him or her.
We have worked with over 1000 couples and thousands of individuals with relationship problems. Though we cannot guarantee that every marriage we work with will be saved, our work with marriages in crisis has been studied by independent researchers and found to be many times more effective than traditional methods of counseling and therapy.
If your marriage is in crisis it is in need of an “Emergency Room” form of treatment. Taking a marriage enrichment class or going to counseling would be analogous to making an appointment for a check-up with your family doctor or taking a general health class while you are having a major heart attack. While these are good resources, it is not likely that you would even survive if you don’t first go to the E.R. to get the relational bleeding stopped. In fact, many of our attendees have actually spent months in counseling, prior to attending our workshops, without making any positive progress. However, after completing the workshop they are able to make great strides with that same counselor now that they are no longer in crisis mode.
What many fail to recognize is that, whether or not they stay married, they will always have a relationship with the person who is currently their spouse. If you share custody of children or have any joint financial obligations, it will be more crucial than ever that the two of you get better at relating to each other. If your spouse believes that the marriage needs to end, let them know that your desire is to make the relationship healthier, regardless of whether or not they choose to remain married to you.
The schedule is not convenient for us: No trip to the Emergency Room comes at a convenient time. The reality of most of our lives is that there is just not enough time for all the things we need and want to do, much less deal with unpleasant circumstances. Likewise, if your marriage is in crisis, putting off treatment will most likely only increase the chances that things will get worse or even cause the relationship to get to the point where one or both is no longer willing to give it a chance. If you believe that there is no chance for your marriage to work, keep in mind that you will always have a relationship with the person who is presently your spouse. So, it is in your own best interest to make that relationship as healthy as it can be.
If we can help you with any of these or any other obstacles, please contact us by clicking here.